Monday at 11:45 I received a voice mail message from Joyce
Williams that she wanted to get Dad’s “team” together at 1 pm and go over his
progress with me; she would call me again just before 1 and have everyone on
speaker phone. The problem was I didn’t
get the message until 1:15 while I was on lunch during my clinicals. I immediately called her back and wouldn’t
you know it, I got her voice mail. At
first I was pissed that they conducted the meeting without me, but then it hit
me there is no way they could have conducted the meeting in less than 15
minutes. Then I was really mad; who sets
up a meeting like this at the last minute without giving the family
notice? We’ve been through this stuff
before over the last few years, there are protocols and calendars to organize –
no one can get 3 or 4 department heads together that quickly.
Yes, I spent the last 10 minutes of my lunch leaving a very
angry and nasty message on Ms. Williams’ voice mail explaining my displeasure
in very loud and not so nice terms (the language was all PG-13, they do still
have Dad afterall). I just let her know
that I didn’t appreciate the last minute notice on something that was so very
important & I’d appreciate at least a phone call that checked my schedule
as well as everyone else’s. After my
clinicals I called Kris to vent (he’s very good at listening to me vent these
last few months; I’m really going to have to do something nice for him soon)
and then I called Dad to find out what happened at the meeting. “What meeting” he said. I had a feeling he didn’t know anything about
it since he hadn’t mentioned it the day before when we talked, but I also
didn’t want to make it seem to him like I was keeping things away from him. I told him about the voice mail & he was
understandably upset. Not only did they
not tell him about the meeting, he had no idea they were calling me in on it
without him.
Ms. Williams called Tuesday literally 2 minutes before I was
to clock in at work to let me know Dad was “very upset” and she wanted to “apologize
for the short notice yesterday” and to try to schedule another meeting at my
convenience. (I didn’t know until this
morning when I talked to him that he used the colorful language I didn’t on
her. J )
The make-up meeting was set up for noon Wednesday.
One the call was the Director of Rehab, Nursing, and of
course the facility Business Manager.
Dad was not on the call, in the room nor had anyone talked to him before
they talked to me. I was told they
wanted to talk to me first (as his next of kin and holder of his power of
attorney) and then they would tell him what we all discussed. …ok so now I know Dad has not been
exaggerating about being kept in the dark in the least little bit. Great – this is not going to be a fun time
for any of us.
The director of rehab started out by telling me about Dad’s
progress since he came to the facility.
It was slow going, but they were making progress; he was able to walk
around 50’ with the use of a walker without really stopping to rest. His occupational therapy was going well too;
he was able to dress himself again, he did need help with the lower extremities
(always has since the hip surgery so that wasn’t too much of a surprise), but
they were making progress. What derailed
the progress was the fluid in his legs and abdomen that was not only holding
him back physically it was causing him pain. (No joke really – he’s only been
complaining about that since he ended up in the hospital – oh wait that was the
major reason he WAS in the hospital!)
Since then he hasn’t even been able to get out of bed by himself or with
the help of 2 aides; they are now having to use a hoya lift to get him out of
bed. He has lost all balance and is
unable to stand alone. She even made
mention of the fact that he’s been complaining of pain in his wrist (the right
one that has been damaged since his fall & the reason I’m having to take
care of all of his bills & things).
Then she dropped the hammer.
Per Medicare guidelines since he is no longer making any progress in his
rehabilitation nor does it seem like he wants to make any progress, they are no
longer able to report to Medicare (which pays 100% for the first 21 days and
then 80% for days 21-100; his secondary insurance picks up the remaining 20%)
that he needs continuing care. It’s not
that he’s ready to be released it’s that he’s not meeting the insurance
guidelines that will allow either insurance to continue paying for his care. Bottom line if he’s going to continue there
or be release to an assisted living facility and/or nursing home it’s going to
start coming out of pocket in the next two weeks or so.
The Business Manager was next on the line to reiterate what
the Rehab Director stated. They needed
to start looking at Dad’s options financially… and now. Basically I have until the end of the month,
maybe until the 15th to figure out how to keep him where he is to
the tune of an $8000 price tag. She did
suggest we start the Medicaid application because that does take 45 days to
complete let alone find out if you’re approved.
She did “warn” me that once he’s approved (if he’s approved) they will
take everything leaving him $40 a month for spending money. The rational is that since they are paying
for all his needs (room, board, and medical) he shouldn’t need any of his money
for anything else. (Which makes sense in
one way – until you look at the responsibilities you have outside basic needs
to survive. And yes I said survive because
if you ask me this is no way to live – no way what so ever.) All of his income; retirement, social
security and yes the rental property would go to his care and the rest would be
picked up by Medicaid.
I thought I had more time to save the old house at least, but
I don’t. I knew we were going to be
cutting it close because they go back and look at your financials for the last
five years but I thought I had time to sell the house and at least pay off his
bills completely with the money. I
talked to the lawyer that did the POAs for a few minutes this morning. I was hoping I would be able to move the
house into my name and give me time to sell it, but he said that wasn’t going
to work. He also said that since I had
POA, I didn’t need to move it, I just needed to sell it; although he did agree
the faster the better. Funny thing, he
felt it would be better to sell the one he’s living in first and then the old
house. Damn I hate that idea b/c there
are still some things in that house that I want. Guess I better start figuring out how to make
that trip home aye? Anyone want to help
me go through Dad’s house? Yeah I didn't think so but can't blame a girl for asking.